I planned to celebrate Ash Wednesday with a full day of ministry work. A service at our local senior apartment complex. Lunch with the town's ministers. An afternoon in the office followed by a church dinner, Bible study, and evening worship. That's what I had planned.
I really celebrated Ash Wednesday by getting stuck in our church's elevator. Yeah. I did that.
I got the books out, set up the DVD player, collected extra Bibles from around the church. All was well.
But then I went downstairs to get the 200-pound 5-foot tall entertainment center. (No, I'm not that in shape - it's on wheels).
It needed to be upstairs for the Bible study, so I wheeled it across the Fellowship Hall and then pulled it into the elevator behind me. Before I could think through what a bad idea this was (hint: a REALLY bad one), the door shut behind it and I was trapped. Trapped between a giant entertainment center and the back of the elevator.
I couldn't reach the door to get out. I couldn't scoot around the entertainment center to reach the door. I couldn't climb over it or crawl under it. I was totally stuck.
I wasn't in immediate distress. I had a few feet of breathing room and the elevator is solid. But this was not in my plans for the day. It was Ash Wednesday! I am a pastor! I was very busy and had things to do! I was not yet even finished with my sermon for the evening, not to mention the eighteen emails and many phone calls I had to return!
(You can probably see where this is going. As usual, it took me a little longer to figure it out.)
Luckily, the elevator has a phone in it. Unluckily, the phone is about 85 years old and it wouldn't accept our long distance code. The only phone numbers I know by heart are long-distance (my husband still has a California cell number!).
So I spent half an hour trying to figure out how to get out. I couldn't climb out. I couldn't push my way out.
No one else was going to be at the church until 5pm. Our custodian had already left for the day.
I knew that my husband would eventually come looking for me (I was scheduled to stop by the house around 3pm to feed our little boy), but I wasn't sure how long that would take and how worried he would become. If he called the police to report me missing in our small town, I was pretty sure that I would die of humiliation.
During my stint in the elevator, I ruminated on two basic things:
1) I really, REALLY have to pee.
2) I tried to do yet another thing on my own, without asking for help, and look where it got me. It's Ash Wednesday - a day where we remember our dependence on God - and I've been so busy running around like a headless chicken that I've gotten myself, quite literally, stuck.
This led to another realization:
2a) Gee, maybe God is trying to tell me something.
Then I did one thing:
1) I prayed.
It went something like this:
"Jesus, this is embarrassing. And I know we've had this talk before - that I should ask for help and not try to do everything on my own. And I know that I've spent all day running around getting things ready for other people to worship here tonight, but I haven't yet spent time with you myself. I'm pretty embarrassed about that, actually, and I'm even more embarrassed that I didn't even realize I hadn't spent time with you until just now.
"So I get it. You needed to stop me in my tracks to remind me that I need you. Thank you for reminding me. But for now, I am just a touch claustrophobic, and I really have to pee. Will you help me out of here, please?"
And then Jesus put the idea in my head that maybe I should call the operator.
Did you know that there are still phone operators? There are! I dialed "0" and spoke to a woman named Myrna and told her my sad story, and she connected me. I don't know if that was legal of her or not. I don't know if a $57 dollar charge will soon show up on our church phone bill. All I know is that the call went through and within minutes, I was rescued. Thoroughly embarrassed, but rescued.
Thank you, Jesus.
My husband rescued me and then I returned home and dropped to my knees for awhile. I asked for forgiveness for my hurry. I confessed my sin of pride that keeps me from accepting offers of help. I thanked God for the oh-so-clear reminder of my utter dependence on him.
I also took a lot of deep breaths. You don't really know if you have a touch of claustrophobia until you get stuck in an elevator. Phew.
Then I went through the rest of a holy Ash Wednesday - dinner at church, Bible study, worship. It felt more real, somehow.
As I closed my message, a short sermon on Luke 9 and Genesis 3:19, I preached what I had learned that day anew.
"Remember that you are dust," I said. "But also remember that we serve a God who breathes new life into the dust. I am not okay. You are not okay. But because of Jesus, it will be okay."
Not how I planned to celebrate Ash Wednesday, but then, that's how God works sometimes.
Wow! What a crazy story turned beautiful illustration! So glad that Myrna was there for you. Great post!
ReplyDeleteLoved this so much! Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThis would make a great commercial...both for AT&T and for Jesus!
ReplyDeleteB.Niel - Myrna is my new favorite person EVER. ;)
ReplyDelete